Socialize or Excercise

It's probably a bad sign that when I look at the word exercise, I'm convinced it's not spelled correctly.

I went to bed last night with a really bad headache.
I took two Advil to make it stop.
I woke up and really could not motivate myself to get up and go to the gym, as I really really wanted to, before starting work.
I tried.
It didn't happen.
I felt fuzzy. Which is weird considering I didn't have anything to drink last night!
When I finally got myself out of bed, but not to the gym, I realized I took two TYLENOL PM, and not Advil as I believed.
I now understand why I feel hungover without the help of any alcohol.
I make it through the day thinking I will go to the gym.
I also think about how badly I feel for people who get headaches on a regular basis.
I think, "That must really suck." And I say as much to a friend who unfortunately gets headaches for, like, 50% of her life. (I verified this statistic with said friend).
I procrastinate.
I think I might do yoga inside my apartment instead.
I do more work.
I take more calls.
I do even more work.
The knot in my stomach grows and I realize I'm running out of time.
I have to meet my friend for coffee.
I have to meet another friend for dinner.

No.

I have to fucking work out.

So I decide to do something that doesn't come naturally to me.
I call my friend and cancel. Explaining that I need to go with the part of me that is actually canceling a coffee date to catch up, and instead going to the gym.
I change into my workout clothes.
Stop an IM conversation abruptly.
Put up my IM status declaring I'm ending the day with a run at the gym. I mean, it might as well be carved in stone, engraved in gold, if you will, once it becomes a Yahoo! IM status. Right?

Clothes on. Check.
Committed to ending the work day. Check.
In the car and en route to the gym. Check.

I already feel better knowing I'm going to work out.

I run 1 1/2 miles without stopping.
And I feel.
So.
Much.
Better.

Post Game Grade = F

Yeah all my dreams and hopes of being a responsible, caring and healthy person (to my body) post game have fallen short- way short. I've been eating way too much and of all the wrong foods. And instead of dragging this out even more and ruining all the good work I've done for the past 11 months, it stops. Now.

It doesn't mean I have to be perfect. It doesn't mean every meal needs to be the right mix of carbs, protein, fat and veggies. It doesn't even have to be at a certain time (although it is helpful to keep on to some sort of schedule). But what it does mean is I have to be way more conscious of what I am putting into my body. I need to think before I eat. Determine if I'm even hungry (and ask myself what for). And work on putting healthier things into my mouth.

This morning, resolved to turn this around, I woke up and went straight to the gym. I haven't been since spin class last Tuesday morning. And I haven't gone running in I don't know how long. Yet this weekend and I was lounging poolside (with an ocean view to boot!) up at my father-in-law's (while he was out of town, of course) I found myself catching up on old fitness magazines, continually drawn to running workouts. I tore a few running plans out and felt inspired enough to get back on the treadmill this morning.

My goal, having not run in at least a month, was simple: see if I could run for just a mile without stopping. If you'll remember, back in the day (like two months ago), I managed to get myself up to 3 1/2 miles without stopping. So I'm happy to report that I started off slowly and had to gradually increase the speed and was able to continue running for 1 1/2 miles without stopping. It felt good to get back into the gym and even better to be running.

Now, it's not even 9am and I've already worked out, had a protein shake for breakfast, downed nearly a liter of water and written on my blog.

Today's a good day.

Today is one of those days when I'm really grateful to be working from home. My father would have turned 61. And for some reason it hurts more than other years. But this is how grief goes. It doesn't make sense. It catches you off guard. It comes and goes. And it really really sucks when you're not expecting it!

I feel it today more than I have in a while. The pinching of my heart. The difficulty in breathing. The overwhelming sadness. The crying that I can't seem to get under control. And it's not even 8am.

I don't know why this year is more difficult than I remember it being in the past. But I'm sure it has to do with a variety of facts. Like, he'll never meet Quinn. He won't get to see how insane Lila has become- a child we all felt bad for upon entering the world behind Julia, but who is clearly setting herself apart from her undeniably outgoing and unique sister. He will never get the chance to witness just how unique Julia is and continues to be. He would have gotten such a kick out of all three of them. Katie needs his job advice and wisdom. His daughters miss him. His wife aches without him.

The truth is I've been especially missing my father a lot this past month.

In early June I went back to New England for a very good family friend's high school graduation. I realized it was the first time I had been back in over six years for a happy occasion. Every other visit previously had to do with my dad being sick or dying, or fulfilling some obligation related to his death. It was nice to have a happy reason to go back there.

I was caught off guard though. I didn't anticipate it being so difficult to be up there. We had plenty of down time while we were there. Time to just relax. Hang out. Drive around. Visit. Explore. Reconnect. Have fun. And although we weren't staying in Lancaster (the town I grew up in), we went over there one day. Before going, I hadn't given it a single thought. I just figured it'd be nice to be back up there and to see the house and to visit with my dad's best friend who still misses him and thinks about him every day. But as we approached Lancaster my heart started tightening, my stomach crawled into a knot and tears started forming in the corners of my eyes.

First we drove by the garage he parked at for work. Tug.

Then we rounded the corner and drove through downtown. Tug tug.

We parked on Main Street and crossed the street to go into Simon the Tanner, a store my dad loved. Tug. Tear. Deep breaths.

We piled back into the car and drove up Elm Street. Deep breaths. Tug. Tear. Tug. Tug.

As we turned onto Winter Street and drove by our house, we all looked to see how it had changed over the years. How it seemed worn down and a little worse for the wear. Tug. Pinch of anger. Tug. Tear.

We flipped the car around and pulled into the driveway of our next door neighbor. She pulled all of us into a hug and was delighted and happy to see us. Grateful that we stopped by. Tug. Tear. Deep breaths.

We made it to our lunch destination. Deep breaths. Big hugs. Relief. Sadness.

As we moved into George's home, I saw Katie's moose antlers (a souvenir from the car accident when my Dad was teaching her how to drive that George is holding onto, Katie made sure we told George she wants it written in his will). Tug.

I saw a photo from an ice storm my dad took set on the wall directly next to the TV. "I look at it everyday and think of your Dad." Tear. Tear. Tear.

And then my eyes land on a chair I haven't seen or thought about since September of 2004. I couldn't believe this chair was sitting in George's living room. It didn't go with the decor for sure. But this was basically where my dad spent the last few months of his life. Every meal he ate during his illness was done from that chair. Later when I asked my mom about it, even she didn't remember how it came to be George's. When I asked George about it he said, "The chair is just my way of being together hope that doesn't sound silly to you." Insert more tears. He made that chair fit in an already full living room against the wishes of his live in love.

We were blessed with exceptionally wonderful (and cool) weather. Being there was a reminder of how beautiful it is in that corner of the world. I realized how much I missed it. And how easy it is for me to live my everyday life out here in Santa Monica without being saddened by my father's death. He never came out here in all the years I lived in California. I don't walk down Montana Ave. and think about his favorite store on that street- I'm certain he wouldn't have one! I don't have reminders around every corner that tug at my heart.

I think of him every single day, but I'm not confronted with memories of him out here. So being back home was difficult in that way. And I think the sadness of that has been sitting with me for a few weeks now. So that when I got to today, his 61st birthday, that sadness is still here.

I'm okay with that. But it's definitely a more difficult day than I anticipated. Just like the way my emotions approaching and driving through and being in Lancaster bubbled up to the surface with barely any warning, it's happening today and I just need to go through that.

For now, I'll leave you with one of my favorite pictures of my Dad. This was taken at Kara's wedding:


We miss and love you Dad.

One of the hardest things for me to do (even still) is to spend time on my own and do nothing. Nothing to me means not cleaning or running around like a crazy person and certainly not working. And with Steve heading out to the Dodgers game with his dad, I knew tonight was the night to do nothing.

I resisted making plans with friends- which was really difficult for me- and managed to stay in for most of the day and caught up on TV, ate dinner by myself and got in bed before 9pm. A few times I was tempted to make plans, but I'm happy to say, I managed to spend a night by myself and everything went just fine thank you very much!

I've come a very long way from always having to have every second planned and scheduled, and needing to be surrounded by people all the time, but I still feel like it's something I have to work on. In fact, for the next round of the game, I may make my habit having to spend 30 minutes on the couch watching TV, reading a book/magazine or writing. No technology invited! I think I can really benefit from chilling the f out.

It's nice though, to have that alone time to do whatever I want (I chose to get caught up on the rest of Friday Night Lights- that show is really really good!). I feel really rested and am very happy I still have one more day of this weekend to enjoy!

Night night!

The day before weigh-in is always an interesting day. Today's meals have consisted of:

1- balance bar.
2- 2 pieces of string cheese, 1 piece of wheat bread with 1t of natural peanut butter.
3- red leaf lettuce with rotisserie chicken, apple, oil & vinegar.
4- red leaf lettuce with rotisserie chicken, apple, oil & vinegar.

I have yet to consume meal #5, but I think it'll be either another balance bar or a protein shake. While my husband, on the other hand, will be treated to Umami Burger here in Santa Monica. I just discovered they have a Santa Monica location inside Fred Segal and thought it'd be a great way for Steve to spend his dinner. I am a good wife. I will be sitting watching him devour a really f'n good burger.

I'm fine with it. And will be happy when week two is over and we head into week through after the weigh-in.

One quick side note. I jump roped today for the first time in a million years and I really loved it. It got my heart rate up really high and I could feel it in my legs. I love exercises where you feel them working instantly!

Yes I'm Here

I lost six points today. The first six points I've lost in the nearly two weeks since we've been playing this round of the game. A burger and hot dog at a work BBQ were calling my name. I couldn't turn away. Or rather, I didn't want to turn away.

I've been struggling a bit with the game lately. Not in any monumental way. I'm still holding steady at around 40lbs lost. Which is great. But I want to keep moving the number down. Since I've been playing for nearly a year, I'm feeling an urge to switch things up a bit. And I think I'm going to do just that after this round ends.

After playing for so long, and realizing that this just needs to be incorporated into my life, I want to entertain changes to make this more manageable for the longer haul I need to be focused on:

1. Take more time off between rounds. When we only have a few days or a week off in between rounds, I find myself going to town trying to cram in all the foods I can't eat on a regular basis while on program. With more time before starting the next round, I'm hopeful that I won't feel the need to do as much damage as I can in a short period of time.
2. Instead of taking a day off, when I play the next round, I'd like to play around with having the option to instead take multiple meals off throughout the week. I think this'll allow for more flexibility and eliminate the day off mentality of fit it all into one day to satisfy all your cravings.

I've gone back to working out with Britt two times a week. And it's been amazing. One of the hardest exercises she had me do was a plank with a dumbbell row. You can watch a super quick video of it here so I can illustrate my point. By the way, I was doing that with 17 1/2 lb weights. Yowzers.

My good habit this round has been to write at least once a day. I can do that either online (which I've clearly not been doing much of lately), in my journal or through writing a letter. I like to write and find that it clears my head, but lately I've been doing it through real letter writing (who doesn't like to get a real letter in the mail?) or in my journal. I will try and be better about updating on here.

I have an 8am training sesh, so I must sign off!

Santa Monica Pretty House Series...

...comes to an end.

For now.

But in the meantime, enjoy a slide show of almost all the houses I took pictures of over the course of the past two weeks.



I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did!

The crazy thing is I only went around a very small part of Santa Monica. I know there's so much more exploring I can, and will, do all around me and once I'm back in LA, I hope to do more.

It was a fun way to get out more frequently than I may have normally and it helped me fall even more in love with Santa Monica.

And maybe, if I hit it big (my mom mentioned getting lottery tickets no fewer than four times during her visit), I will be taking a picture of my own Santa Monica house one day!

Santa Monica Pretty House- 10

We started our day with a walk to Peet's and then meandered our way through some more Santa Monica neighborhoods. I only took a few pictures today as I'd walked a lot of this route before. However I did manage to snap a photo of a house I hadn't seen before that caught my eye!


9th Street
Favorite Part: I'm loving the frame of the front of the house and the big balcony.

Santa Monica Pretty House- 9

With me mum in town visiting, I wanted to take her to the gym so she could get a shot at seeing some of the famous people Katie and I keep running into. So instead of a morning stroll around Santa Monica, we went to the gym before dinner. I got in a 3-mile run, but made sure to take a short walk to drop the rent off.

Steve and I walked a few blocks out of our way to get tonight's picture. Some complained more than others, "You said we were only going to drop off the rent. I just want you to acknowledge that I've been on my feet all day!" I continued blissfully unaware that I was inconveniencing anyone and happy to continue exploring. For as short of a walk as we went on, I was happy with the options.

The house I chose reminds me of Pretty House #2 in style. While not entirely similar, it resembles the house slightly. Take a look:

9th Street
Favorite Part: The turret is what captured my eye and then the green trim and tile sealed the deal!

Santa Monica Pretty House- 8

The pretty house featured below was actually taken on yesterday's walk around Santa Monica. Today was such a busy day, taking a walk around Santa Monica just wasn't in the cards. I had a kick-ass workout with Britt, followed by a drive to Beverly Hills for pizza, then off to The Huntington Library, Art Collection & Botanical Gardens. It was a gorgeous day in Southern California and we had another fun-filled day with my mom in town.

Yesterday's walk around Santa Monica brought me to this house. A house I've walked by hundreds of times and never noticed before. This one caught the eye of Me Mum and Twin as well:

4th Street
Favorite Part: The windows built into the roof and the perfect flower boxes.

Santa Monica Pretty House- 7

For years I've admired this house. I walk by it a couple times a week and anytime there's a new visitor in town, I point this out to them- I make them ooh and ahhh at the amazing landscaping. Everytime I show it off, I say, "Look. It's what I call the Secret Garden house."

There is, in fact, a garden growing out of this house. There are plants and flowers all over it, making it nearly impossible to tell where the plants end and the house begins. There's a tree house across the street and I swear if only I could get into that, I'd be able to finally capture a shot that really does this house justice. But until that happens, I'm just going to have to settle for the view I currently have access to!

See for yourself:

Palisades Drive
Favorite Part: Besides the unbelievable landscaping on the house, I love the huge window.

Santa Monica Pretty House- 6

Today was a jam packed day (3 mile run at the gym by 715am, quick visit to the groomer, car wash, Goodwill drop off, airport pick-up, lunch, Sex and the City 2, dinner and now finally home) which really didn't leave me with any extra time to take a stroll admiring the beautiful houses of Santa Monica.

So instead, you get a picture of a house that I passed by on yesterday's late morning stroll. (For the record, I have nearly 75 pictures of houses I've taken since Monday!)


10th Street
Favorite Part: The unique mustardy, celery color of the house.

Santa Monica Pretty House- 5

I only walked along two blocks today: 9th and 10th streets between Montana & San Vicente and I had a really hard time just choosing one house that I liked the best. But when I walked by this house, I just knew. In fact, I gasped when I saw it and was happy that there weren't a lot of cars in front of the house so I could capture a good shot.

I had to do a little editing with the photo so you could see the red door a little better, but check out today's pretty house:

9th Street
Favorite parts: circle windows, half circle windows and the archway over the red door!

Santa Monica Pretty House- 4

Clancy and I woke up and heard the sound of helicopters flying right around our neighborhood. So we chose to head out in that direction and grabbed the camera. I knew we'd wind up going through some of the fancy neighborhoods, but wanted to see what all the commotion was. Turns out there was an accident in the wee hours of the morning from a probable DUI that caused some pipe to burst and all hell broke loose.

Within the first four blocks of our walk, we were greeted by people who were (literally) singing "Hello!" to us and smiling as they walked by. One woman stopped to gush about how adorable Clancy was and marvel at how much puppy was in his 7-year old body (this happens a lot). I'm all for saying hi and being friendly, just ask anyone who knows me, but it was so weird it made me look around wondering if I had wandered onto the set of that Jim Carrey movie where it turns out his life was a movie (what was the name of that?).

Anyway, Clancy and I couldn't really see any of the action, apart from the three helicopters and the resulting traffic backing up on the PCH and all over Santa Monica, so we merrily went on our way to capture more pictures of the fancy houses.

This morning's walk (with a little bit of running) took us along Ocean Avenue and up Adelaide. The house we went with today is one we walked by yesterday, but I had a better shot of the house heading east on Adelaide (as opposed to west, where I was coming from yesterday). See for yourself:

Adelaide
Favorite Part: I'm a sucker for green! Plus it's very "New Englandy".

Santa Monica Pretty House- 3

After a nearly vomit inducing workout at the gym this morning (for reals), I was looking forward to a walk this evening with my friend Carrie, and Clancy, of course, to help wind down the work day.

Our walk took us along Adelaide, one of the prettiest streets in Santa Monica if you ask me. There's a gorgeous view of the ocean and the Santa Monica canyon and there are two sets of absolutely insane stairs that provide an intense workout for those who dare (that would be me). On top of that, each house seems to be more gorgeous than the other and the flowers and different types of plants that line the street and lawns are so visually appealing. The bougenvilla alone is unbelievable once it starts blooming.

Finding just one house along this street was a challenge. So I am certain I'll be featuring another house before this assignment is up. But the house I chose sits in between the concrete and wooden sets. And although it's not totally my style, it is a very cool looking house. Check it out for yourself:

Adelaide
Favorite Part: It looks like a castle!

Santa Monica Pretty House- 2

Today's walk brought us up Montana Avenue to stop at Peets for Katie's morning caffeine fix. So we continued to meander through Santa Monica neighborhoods I don't usually walk through.

It was hard to choose just one house, especially because I made sure to snap a lot of pictures, but, here's today's pretty house from this morning's walk:


14th Street
Favorite part: The insane amounts of plush, green cactus and plants.

Santa Monica Pretty House 1

My friend Gail started a remarkable blog documenting life in her small town of Westfield, New Jersey. She chronicles the happenings around town, the good places to eat and shares some great history that makes you want to pick up your life and make it your home too. One of my favorite aspects of her blog is every Friday she posts pictures of that week's pretty houses. The houses are stunning. I've provided a link for my favorite understated house so far- the first one. Green, of course.

I've been inspired by Gail's blog and living in Santa Monica (which is where Gail and her husband were living when I first met them) I'm surrounded by these unbelievable houses that I feel compelled to share with people. I walk along the palm-tree lined streets and drool at the houses dreaming that someone has to have a guest house they want me and my husband and our adorable dog to live in.

This idea to really capture some of these houses came to me on a walk Clancy and I went on this morning before starting work. A very good friend reminded me on Friday that I was trying to work normal hours and noticed that I'd started to get on at weird early hours and was stopping work well after a normal quitting time. It was a good reminder that when I find myself working long days, I just don't take care of myself the way I need to.

On Friday I shut my work computer off, removed access to work email from my iPhone and gave myself the weekend to try and just chill out. And while I was still a little on edge this morning, I vowed to make it a good day. I knew I would automatically feel better if only because of starting up a two-week mini round of the game.

By 830am, I had already gone for a walk/run with Clancy (exercise for the day- check), taken care of my bad habit (leaving my room sloppy and the bed unmade before starting my day) and good habit (writing at least one letter a day) and made a trip to the grocery store for game friendly food. I didn't get on my work computer until 9am and it felt great to just ease into the day and the work week.

While I was out on my walk, I decided a good way to motivate me to keep up with my exercise would be to start posting a picture of these houses in Santa Monica that catch my eye. I'll admit the idea didn't come to me until I was at the end, so while this isn't necessarily one of my favorite houses, it fulfilled the duty of capturing a pretty house on my walk.

So not only will I get to show off how pretty some of these houses are in Santa Monica, but my hope is that in the next two weeks, it'll help me get outside and walk around more and take better care of myself.

Here's the first house:


Alta
Favorite part: the red door!

PS- Thanks Gail for the inspiration!

Wisdom: I never got anywhere faster by being harder on myself

"I never got anywhere faster by being harder on myself."

This is my favorite line from Mandy Ingber's Yogalosophy DVD- which I highly recommend. I'm pretty sure I've talked about and recommended the DVD before (what are you waiting for? Go out and get a copy!). But as I continue down this path of body acceptance, loving myself just as I am and focusing on a healthy and balanced life, I keep coming back to this statement Mandy makes while effortlessly guiding you through a gentle ass kicking workout.

I'm in this place where I'm really trying to focus on this more than I ever have. I've definitely gotten nowhere in the past by being hard on myself by talking trash or having unrealistic expectations.

I've lost nearly 40 lbs with the game. And I think that's amazing. But I'm recognizing that I'm in a space where I want to be past that. I have a significant amount of weight that I still want to lose. When people ask me how it's going and if I'm still playing the game, I typically say "Yes. I'm hovering between 35-40lbs down. Which is great, but I really want to lose more." The old Molly would say things like that and would be impatient. So I'm just trying to focus on how truly amazing it is that I've held steady with this much weight loss and continue all the good work I'm doing.

I knew this would be a long process and I just need to keep at it. And while I do that, I need to remember that I too never got anywhere faster by being harder on myself. So I'm going to do the opposite and just celebrate my accomplishments and put a lot of love out there in the universe for this path I've taken and will continue to take until I'm at the end of it.

CSA California- Sign me up!

In order to write this blog entry, I needed to look up the definition of CSA. It means Community Supported Agriculture. Or for me, it means I don't have to go to the Farmer's Market to go shopping for fresh fruits and veggies. I just have to pull behind a raw foods restaurant here in Santa Monica (that I'll likely never eat at) on Sunday evenings and pick up a bag of delicious and nutritious food.

I was inspired by my good friend Tif who does this all the way on the other side of the country in North Carolina. She's talked about it for a couple of years, and I've always scoffed at it, reminding myself that I'm too damn picky to just go with a box of random fruits and veggies that someone else picks out for me. But, like a lot of things since playing the game, that's all changed. And I may go as far as saying I'm determined to at least try everything that comes my way. However, I hate beets, for example, I think they absolutely taste like dirt, so I'm not sure I'll really be able to live up to that since it came in this week's grab bag.

Here's a look inside this week's bag:


I am excited to try this out for the next four weeks though. I am sure I'll be eating a variety of things I've never had before and branching out even more.

PS- I already tried a tangelo and I have to say, it was delish!

Chocolatey Goodness

I'm in Chicago for work and I'm about to call it a night. But first, I wanted to show a picture of what I 100% resisted at dinner tonight:


It wasn't easy, especially because I was the only one out of five who wasn't eating any of this chocolatey goodness. And to make matter worse, there were leftover! I couldn't fathom there being any leftovers with four people to eat these seemingly tiny desserts, but, I did feel pretty great walking away and sticking perfectly to my meal plan all day!

S'mores Torte

I fully realize this is a blog pretty much devoted to losing weight and leading a generally healthy and nutritious life. But, I've learned that in order for me to do that, I need to be able to stray from time to time. (Not necessarily as much as I do in between games, but a little bit here and there).

In the checkout line at the grocery story (which is literally, right next door to me & Steve, as I've mentioned before), I was taunted by and finally picked up the Better Homes & Garden Desserts magazine special. $9.95 later and a very impressive array of desserts to try, I walked home and thumbed through the magazine. I did this the day before the last game ended and knew I wanted to make something for girl's night dessert.

I was pulled in my the S'mores Torte, described as "a childhood flavor with a grown-up flair." The picture alone is what sent me over the edge. See for yourself:


I mean how could you not be motivated to try this after seeing how delish it looks?

I made this last Wednesday, prepped it in the morning and let it freeze during the day while I worked. And then just before I had to go over to the twin's place for girl's night, I brought this with me and finished it off there. Putting it in the broiler seemed crazy. It's an ice cream cake for god's sake! But, I followed the instructions and put it in the broiler until it browned on top.

This is what mine looked like:


I'm not gonna lie, this was one of the best desserts I've ever made. And I highly recommend giving it a try! It was pretty easy to make and a huge crowd pleaser.

Week 4 Results- Game 9

I know, sorry sorry! I meant to blog much sooner than nearly a week after the last game's final weigh-in and it just didn't happen.

Good news- I made the weight goal last week. Burning 1400 calories in just one day really helped get me there, for sure! But so did all the hard work I put into the game leading up to the final weigh-in.

But here's the thing...truth time. Because I've been doing such a terrible job of maintaining what I've learned during the game during the time in between games, I have been essentially gaining and losing the same 8-12 lbs since the end of last year. And that's not where I want to be. Unfortunately, I'm still not at the lowest weight I've been since playing the game.

The good thing is, I have successfully lost just about 35lbs. Which is awesome. And I'm very very proud of that. But I need to break through this yo-yo'ing part of the game and continue on this weight loss path.

To do that, I actually started up yet another round of the game just three days after I finished the last one. I tried to be more accountable the time in between the last two games and that didn't work. So I knew the one thing that would get me in a better position would be to just give myself less time off between games.

We started last Saturday and this is the first time that I've started the game on any day of the week other than Wednesday. I am hoping this is the key to getting me past this same weight I've been gaining and losing for a few months now.

2,000 Calories in Two Days

What was I thinking?

I'll tell you.

I was thinking that I'd like to make weight this week. And in order to do that, I needed to burn more calories than I was taking in. Yesterday I went to the pantry (our nickname for the grocery store literally right next door) and picked up a big box of mixed baby greens, some other random veggies and a rotisserie chicken. I planned on eating nothing but chicken broccoli and salad for two days.

But then I smartened up and remembered that I don't do veggies for lunch. So I stuck to a protein shaken, some fruit almonds and light babybel cheese, two salads with rotisserie chicken and another protein bar yesterday. Then today I had a protein shake, three salads like the one previously described and a protein bar.

I also did six sets of the stairs and a 2 1/2 mile walk yesterday. Today I got in three workouts at the gym- a mixture of interval training, weight training, the elliptical machine and an insane and intense spin class.

I'm really tired!

I know this was a crazy and an overkill kinda two days, but I really want to make weight. I'll report back tomorrow! For now, I'm going to catch up on Parenthood (just started watching it a couple nights ago and have only seen two episodes. So far so great!) and get to sleep. This girl is not long for this world tonight.

Sore Stairs

I recruited a couple more people to do the stairs with me and tonight after work we did my standard 2 1/2 mile look and incorporated six sets of the stairs. I was hoping to get in more, but I had to listen to my body and call it quits with six.

After Saturday's insane nine set workout on the stairs, I woke up this morning and felt every single step really define and point out every muscle fiber in my calves. It's been a while since I've felt sore like this. And while it always feels great, I'd like a little more ease when I walk! It made the stairs a little challenging, but of course, it was a great workout. All told, I burned 600 calories, which I'll take thankyouverymuch.

The final weigh-in of this round of the game is on Wednesday and when I stepped on the scale this morning, I was 2lbs UP from where I finished last week. Good lord. I really hate when the scale doesn't play nice. But, I'm still following the game, still taking good care of myself and I'll work really hard tomorrow to see just how much I can move that scale in the direction I need it to be come Wednesday morning.

Regardless of what the scale says, I'm happy that I'm playing and that it's easier for me to make healthy nutritious choices. Because I recognize that on this very long road to losing all this weight, a few weeks here are there where I plateau or gain are what this journey is all about. I just need to push on through.

More Unusual Trees of Santa Monica

A couple of weeks ago I posted about a leaning tree in Santa Monica. A tree that I have walked by for years, but never really noticed. So since then, I've been trying to pay more attention and capture snapshots of more interesting trees. I wasn't sure what else I'd find, but just Thursday night on my short bike ride home from the gym (where I took a spin class for the first time in a few weeks), I stopped and saw two trees I just had to share with you.

This first tree is a super tall and windy palm tree towering above Ocean Avenue:


And the second one I hardly know how to describe it. It reminds me of a bonsai tree, which maybe it is. But it's crazy how the bushy part of the tree is seemingly upside down.


How many things do you overlook in your own environment because you're not paying attention?

9 sets- boo yeah!

So today I beat my previous record of how many sets I could complete of the Santa Monica stairs. I was able to eek out just one more for a crazy nine f'n sets!

Some of you have asked for a visual of what the stairs look like. Today while climbing up and down and up and down and up and down, I took pictures of them (both sets) to give you a complete visual of what they look like.

This is the first set. The ones I like to call the "easy stairs." They're wooden, wider and busier. And there are 179 of them. Here's what they look like:






And here is the other set. These are concrete, the stairs themselves are narrower and the stairway is narrower as well. Instead of going straight up and down, there are a few steps before each landing that sort of make you zig zag a bit. The landings between the six different portions of the concrete steps can be a welcome place to try and catch your breath and prevent you from keeling over. Oh, and very important, there are 10 more steps, to make one trip up (or down) 189 steps!

This is what the concrete set looks like:












For the record, I have no desire to try and do anything more than 10 sets!

When I completed the 9th set, it felt amazing to know I could do it. But then I had to hop on my bike and ride home. Although it's only a very short distance and didn't take long at all, my legs weren't happy at having to do more work!

Cranky Husband and Stressed Out? Go Spin!

Let me set the scene for you.

It's nearly midnight. I have yet to fulfill my good habit for the day (writing in my journal or posting a blog entry).

The lights are turned off. My husband is snoring. My dog is keeping my friend company on the couch. I'm sitting on Clancy's bed typing. In the dark. If I didn't have company staying the night, I'd be out on the couch typing this up.

But I have points to earn people and a team to not let down!

After a long day of work, still playing a little bit of catch-up after being out of my home office for four work days, I found myself being a little cranky. It didn't help that my husband was also very very cranky. I had visions of Indian food dancing in my head. I could smell the orange chicken from Panda Express taunting me from next door.

What did I do?

I got on my computer, looked up a spin class, found one starting an hour after I poked online, booked myself a bike and got my ass there! It was a new teacher who had, of course, a different teaching style than the other two spin instructors I've taken classes with, but I think I liked this one the best. I managed to not only do everything instructed of me in the class, but I increased the resistance when I was supposed to (instead of pretending like I've done probably 90% of the time during previous classes).

I left the class feeling really great and happy that I was able to deal with my stress in a positive way! It made it so much easier to come home and eat a nutritious game-friendly meal!

These are small changes people, but they're really important ones for me and I'm proud of the progress. Each small (or big) step is leading me in the right direction. And it feels great!

Post NYC and no Damage to Report!

This picture is a perfect representation of what it's like to be playing The Game.



I was on my way to go figure out the 2009 tax damage when I realized I had to make a stop at Whole Foods to get in another meal before I missed points for going over the four hour allotment between meals. I pulled into the parking lot, ran out of the car, ran into Whole Foods, grabbed some brown rice tuna avocado sushi, went to the salad bar and decided to give kale another try and plopped some sesame kale into a container, grabbed a 1.5L bottle of water (nothing like starting to drink your water at 430pm!), raced to the checkout line and then once safely in my car, prepped my food for eating and driving.

Yes I know, somewhere Oprah is horrified. Forget the no phone zone pledge, who knew it should be the no sushi and kale zone pledge?

The game forces you to take care of yourself when you would normally let hours go without eating. Period. It forces you to remember to not only eat, but to eat nutritiously. To take the time to really honor and protect your body.

I went to NYC and actually lost 2.8lbs in the time I was there. I would normally be eating pizza, bagels and dunkin donuts hot chocolate all throughout NYC, but instead I had balance bars, mini cucumbers (which are really cute and delicious and as an added bonus- no seeds!), baby bel cheese, chicken, salad, sashimi...and it was all totally okay. I had some temptations, but tried to fill those during my 100 calories of whatever I wanted. And there was something that felt so great at the end of the trip to go back home knowing that I didn't have all this damage to undue.

You know my whole blog started when I couldn't use a seat belt on a flight from Austin to Los Angeles. I'll never forget what that felt like and every time I get on a plane now, I measure my progress by that stupid f'n seat belt which humiliated and horrified me when I couldn't get it on. But now, nearly 40lbs lighter, it's a great feeling to get on the plane knowing that the seat belt is not taking me down!

Family Time

Here are a few of my favorite pictures from the trip just from my iPhone. I have plenty more on my regular camera, but it'll have to wait until I get home to post some of those.

It's been a very fun family filled trip and it's been such a treat to have this much time with so much of my family. Usually my trips back east are rushed and I'm pulled in a million different directions. So it's a very nice, and welcome, change of pace to not have so much going on and spend it so entirely with my family.

I Hate Squat Dips

Even though I walked a bunch around the city today, I decided to end my long day with a bootylicious butt workout courtesy of Fitness Magazine. I follow Fitness on Twitter and was told about this workout and figured I'd give it a try since I didn't need any equipment in order to workout. This took me a little more than 15 minutes and reinforced that I really hate squat dips. You can check out the workout for yourself here if you want.

The last exercise, the sky squat, really got my HR up and I really liked the tree twist. It reminds me of the fire hydrant exercise from the Yogalosophy DVD.

It's nearly 1am here in NYC and I have to go to bed in the next 40 minutes (which won't be a problem) so I can get my sleep points in for the day.

Happy Friday!

Hello NYC

This is going to be a short blog, because it's almost 1am where I am (NYC) and I still have to workout. I have done a seriously poor job of trying to fit that in, but I have done a seriously good job of surviving a day of travel while on the game. I ate a healthy breakfast en route to the airport and then had two meals while I was on the plane. And then instead of the bacon cheddar burger I really wanted for dinner, I had salmon, asparagus, a dinner salad and a dry baked potato. Go me.

But it was necessary because I didn't make my goal weight this week. In fact, for the first time since I started playing the game, I actually gained 1.4lbs. A clear sign that I need to make some changes to how I'm eating and playing. And not really the easiest thing to do while I'm on vacation in NYC. But I can do this. And I will do this!

For now, I'm off to get in 20 minutes of exercise and then hoping to hit the sack!

PS- Tomorrow I will write about how amazing and adorable Quinn is.

Felicitous Encourters

Here's the email I shared with my other gamer's just now:
i had the most amazing experience at the gym today that i'd like to share with you all.

i walked up to the fourth floor and went to fill up my 1L water bottle to accompany my 3-mile run on the treadmill. a man with a measly 8-oz. plastic bottle stood in line and i graciously told him to go right on ahead of me. the water fountain, while producing very cold water, is very slow and i didn't want him to wait for me. he apologized for taking so long and i told him not to worry about it that i wasn't in a rush. after he was done, he smiled at me and went on his merry way and thanked me again.

i then went about my business and started filling up my water bottle and saw that someone else was coming to fill up their water bottle. i looked up and it was KERI RUSSELL from felicity. in my mind, my eyes bugged out and i got all excited. but in reality, i kept my shit together and just smiled at her and said hi. she said hello back and told me that she was filling up her large water bottle too and to not worry. she is so absolutely stunning in person. tiny, fit and the most clear skin ever. after filling up my water bottle, i checked her out again and then walked into the bathroom to put on my heart rate monitor. sure enough, keri russell followed me in and then changed in the bathroom. she got a phone call and started talking on the phone and i overheard part of her conversation about having to meet someone at the four seasons in beverly hills. we have the same sneakers. i'm just saying.

i went about my business and set out to run three miles even though it had been nearly a week and a half since my last run. and i am also happy to report that in addition to seeing keri russell, i did manage to get in my three mile run! it's nice to see how my body has progressed and maintained. i remember when i used to run the length of one song and walk the length of another song and alternate like that for about 20 minutes. slow and steady for sure.

when i was walking out, i spotted my apparent girl crush doing pilates and tried to take a decent picture. it's not the best but...eat your heart out.

and here's the accompanying picture:


Now, as I wrote in the email to my team and opponents, I did manage to get in a three mile run. Which felt great to do since I've been doing a lot of walking and stairs. Running seems to the workout I keep coming back to and want to maintain. If that's the case then you'd like I'd do it with more regularity.



I want to capture my workout and put it on here so I can start watching my progress on the running front.

Tomorrow is weigh-in. I'm not feeling optimistic about it as the scale wasn't playing nice this morning. But, I'm not going to focus on that. Whatever tomorrow brings, it's just information to help me understand whether what I've been doing for the past week is something I should keep doing, or something I should be changing. Nothing more, nothing less.

The Leaning Tree

There's a great loop I walk that's roughly 2 1/2 miles. I get to walk through fancy neighborhoods in Santa Monica. You know the one with the houses you walk by and wish you could live in. A lot of the houses I am drawn to have a very New England feel to them. They also almost always have pretty flowers that I would undoubtedly kill within minutes of going near. But that's not the point...

There's a stunning ocean view that I'm smacked with as I make the turn onto Adelaide, and just before the first set of the Santa Monica stairs greets me. I'll have to get a picture of that view soon, because it's one of my favorites. You're just going about your business one minute and the next, there's this amazing and expansive view of the ocean. The sun is almost always shining and dancing right on top making it seem like you could go ice skating. I always feel grateful for being exactly where I am in that moment.

And then as if it couldn't get any better, I get to walk along Ocean Avenue where I get to watch the ocean, the waves, the people on the bike path, the Santa Monica Pier and be among all the other health-minded individuals who are running, walking, biking or working out along Palisades Park.

Today as I was walking along Ocean Avenue I saw this tree and had to take a picture of it.

I can't tell you how many times I've walked by this tree and never noticed how it is leaning towards the ocean. But today I was open to seeing new things and had to capture this picture.

I know I pass by things every single day that I've never noticed before. I guess that's part of the excitement of rediscovering new things all the time. But I also think it's a wonderful reward of really having your eyes open and slowing down the pace of life to notice these kinds of things.

Farmer's Market Finds- 4/4/2010

Steve and I went to the Farmer's Market after getting a slow start to our lazy Sunday morning. Since I leave on Thursday to go and meet Quinn and visit my family, I won't be going to the Farmer's Market this Wednesday. No need in getting things I'll maybe eat for a day. So I went today and stocked back up on strawberries and blueberries, pink ranunculus and lilac. In fact, I asked where the lilacs came from and was surprised to hear that they hail from the Camarillo Mountains. That's about an hour away from here and good co-worker and friend lives there so maybe I'll do some exploring and find these lilac trees!

I also picked up some lemons as I was inspired by Jamie Oliver using lemon zest in just about everything.

And then in my effort to try something new, I picked up a fruit I've never heard of before called a pumello. It's basically a Chinese grapefruit- apparently not as bitter. I'll be trying that tomorrow and will report back.



How delicious does all of that look?

In case you were wondering, I finally made the kale. I used this simple recipe which combines a lot of what a few of you suggested. I liked it and will definitely get it again, especially since I was told by a good friend that kale is like the superwoman of veggies! I was surprised and happy that it wasn't quite the same consistency of spinach (slimy and mushy), but rather has a little more structure and toughness to it. If that even makes sense.

We had a really really nice Easter dinner with friends tonight. I ate a little too much (meal off) and also took my exercise day off, but it was a wonderful night filled will really good food and really good friends and really good conversation. A great weekend and an easy start to a really fun week when I FINALLY get to meet Quinn!

Bad Water Management

For some f'n reason it's been really difficult for me to get in all of my water this week. Three liters is seeming like three gallons and on Thursday, I already had to take my water day off.

Because I'm so used to my water day off coinciding with my food day off (that would be today!), it wasn't until 5pm that I started drinking water. I literally brought my own 1L water bottle with me to the Indian restaurant where we went out to dinner tonight so I could get in another liter there. By the time dinner was over, after 9pm, I was down two liters.

But when I got home, I was pretty full from the dinner and the two liters of water and decided to take Clancy and head out for a walk. We did a nice 2 1/2 mile loop, including a set of the stairs and ran for about 1/2 mile of it- yes, even with my full tummy, I was able to run a little bit, which felt nice.

So this was me around 11pm when I got back from the late night workout and still had another liter of water to go:



And this is me, one quick and final liter later totally done with water:


This should be a fun night of sleep!

A New Personal Record

Today I completed eight sets of the Santa Monica stairs...which is a personal best for me. Again, as long as I don't try and go faster than I can, I find that I can last much much longer. Today I did a few sets with my friend Bad Molly and she had to take off earlier than I was ready. Instead of taking a ride with her, I decided to hang back and see how much longer I could keep it up for.

To my own surprise, I was able to exceed my previous best record and I didn't even want to keel over and die by the time I was done. Eight sets! Are you kidding me?! I was pushing it when I tried to run the 1/2 mile home. My legs were all, "Knock if off you ahole, I think eight sets of the stairs is more than enough for one day!" I agreed with my inner monologue and walked the rest of the way home.

I've come a very long way from when I was scared by the stairs and wouldn't even dream of doing them. Now I can do a set without even thinking twice about it. And the fact that I've made my way up to eight sets at a time is amazeballs. I think my cap will be ten sets. I see no reason why I'd ever need to do more than that, ever.

Here's hoping I can walk tomorrow!

Last thought before signing off for the night and shutting down. If you're not watching Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution on ABC- do yourself a favor and catch it online or see if there are re-runs that your DVR can hook you up with. Steve and I just caught the third episode and it was so uplifting and eye-opening. If you have children eating school food, you have to check this out. If you don't start sending your child to school with their own food that you prepare or give them, I'd be shocked! For real, check it out- it's an amazing show.

Farmer's Market Finds- 3/31/2010

The fabulous ladies I'm playing this round of the Game with have reminded me how lucky I am to live in an area with multiple year-round farmer's markets. I will be the first to admit that I don't take advantage of this nearly as much as I should. But, as with most things in my life, that's gotten a bit better since I've been playing the game. I make more of an effort to go to the farmer's market, even if it's only to get my chocolate regelach on my day off.

There's a great farmer's market on Wednesdays and if I can get myself pulled together and out the door during the workday, I am always much happier for adding some healthy and happy food and flowers into my life.

Yesterday I left the farmer's market with just a small bundle:

Beautiful and happy pink ranunculus

I think this is one of my favorite flowers. I love how slowly and completely they bloom and how long they last in this vibrant state.

Lilacs! I love lilacs. I miss a few things about living on the east coast and one of them is the lilac bushes by far. Our house at 22 Winter Street had a few lilac bushes on the property and I loved how wonderful they smelled and how pretty the trees looked once the flowers came out. Unfortunately, I haven't spotted lilac bushes here in Los Angeles, so last year when I saw them at a farmer's market, I was overjoyed! And now I'm always on the lookout for them. Here's the little bunch I picked up yesterday

I found out that you're supposed to smash the bottom of the stems/branches with a hammer to make sure the lilacs drink a lot of water- apparently they drink a lot of water. I love looking at them- it's bringing back happy memories of living in New Hampshire and my parent's house.

And finally, I picked up some kale (thank you for the recipe suggestions Joy, Tif & Carla), a bag of lettuce, blueberries and some of the sweetest yummiest strawberries ever.


The fabulous ladies I'm playing with are scattered all over the country. Bad weather plagues some of them throughout the year making a farmer's market a difficult thing to pull off. And here I am in such a fabulous part of the country and I can't find the time to make it to the farmer's market at least once a week when I have four happening within a few miles of me a week?

I can and will do better and will be happy to share my farmer's market finds!

Kale?

In my ongoing effort to try new things, I picked up what looks like a beautiful head of kale at the farmer's market today. Only problem, I have no idea how to prepare/cook it.

Any suggestions?

Yes, I can certainly google this, but, figured I'd put it out there to see if anyone had any recommendations on how best to prepare kale. As an aside, the consistency of sauteed spinach makes me queasy, so I'm hoping for suggestions that won't be similar to sauteed spinach...but I am up for trying just about anything.

Thanks!

Yoga, Ellpitical, Steamroom, Bed.

As with most nights before the weigh-in, I spent it at the gym. Before dinner I did a quick Yogalosophy workout. Then aftewards, I picked up the twin, went to the gym and got in a quick but difficult 20-minute elliptical hill workout. To top it off, I spent about 10-12 minutes in the steam room trying to relax, but mainly just waiting until I couldn't handle it anymore and had to basically run from the room and right into the shower. I hate being hot and I hate sweating, but I somehow enjoy the steam room and can tolerate it for way longer than I ever anticipated.

The past week has been good. I know I'll lose and meet goal with it being the first week and all. I'm not concerned about that. But I've been happy with how the week has gone and am anxious to get on the scale and have week one over and done with.

I feel like the tiny bit of flexibility the Double W plan affords makes it easier for me to see this as a long term project (which I have felt for quite some time with the Game) and one that I think will help me during the time off between games. By still tracking my points, I feel firmly that it'll help me be more accountable than I have been. That's nearly three weeks away, so I don't have to worry about that just yet.

Night night.

Seven Sets of the Santa Monica Stairs

As it turns out, 515pm on a Monday is not the right time to try and do the Santa Monica stairs. I'm not sure I've ever seen more people out doing the stairs than I did earlier this evening.

I biked to the stairs and managed to get in seven slow burning sets. It felt really great, except for when i felt like I might actually fall over. I also had visions of my legs cramping up in the middle of the night. Not sure I hate anything more than a charlie horse- the feeling of a softball coursing its way through my calf- um, no thank you! But despite all of that, I was happy that I managed to get in seven sets. The stairs are hardcore- emphasis on hard. Yet it's something I like doing because it's one of those activities you think only certain skinny athletic people can do. I may not have the skinny part down- yet- but I am athletic enough to be able to hang on the stairs and that feels really good.

I didn't take my iPhone for my musical companion and I wished I had if only to share the sight that welcomed me as I biked around the corner. The sun was shining down on the Pacific Ocean with a clear blue sky as the backdrop. It was, in a word, stunning. There was a song playing on my shuffle that really resonated with me on such a gorgeous day in Santa Monica- Blessed by Martina McBride. "I have been blessed, and I feel like I found my way..."

Not to get all cornball on you or anything, but as much as I was struggling to get in seven sets of those f'n stairs, I did feel blessed. Especially in light of all that can go wrong with our bodies, you know?

Food Revolution

Steve, Clancy and I just got back from a nice 2 1/2 mile walk around Santa Monica and we also did a set of the stairs. I spent all day, other than this walk, being totally lazy- drinking water and green tea and watching movies- Grey Gardens & Australia. Steve and I also started the day watching two episodes of Jamie Oliver's horrifying Food Revolution and the craziest thing happened.

I had just polished off my breakfast of oatmeal, farmer's market fresh strawberries and a titch of maple syrup. Yet on the TV, Jamie Oliver had set out a week's worth of food for a family in West Virginia. It was so gross and before I knew it, I felt nauseous. I told Steve as much and he agreed. But then I threw him the remove and quickly went into the bathroom where I continued to boot twice! It was just really bizarre. Not sure if maybe I got food poisoning from dinner last night (sushi which didn't quite agree with me at the time), or if it really was the nastiness I was seeing people consume.

The show in general had quite the effect on me and Steve. Not that I'm all about processed food, but I'm definitely more for making my own foods after watching that show. I highly recommend watching that show to get a greater understanding of how important it is to instill healthy eating habits in the younger generations- and to take charge of this ourselves by being more in control of what goes into our mouths. Jamie Oliver was on Oprah last week and here's a link to learn more about it.

Happy Sunday!

New Foods

For this round of the game, I'm following the Weight Watchers (Double W) food plan, but mostly still eating Game appropriate food. Where it deviates a little is that I don't have to eat the fat/carb or fruit/protein/veggie combo. Instead, I just have to make sure I eat the points necessary to be on program.

What is great about this is it allows me to have a little more variation in my food choices. For example, with the remaining points I needed to eat tonight, I had a killer dinner which consisted of whole wheat pasta, tomato sauce, turkey meatballs and low fat ricotta cheese with a side salad. I haven't had anything resembling spaghetti for a long time and I forgot how much I liked it.

Two great purchases this week that I highly recommend:
1 bag of frozen turkey meatballs.
1 12-pack of turkey burgers (a 4-pack usually costs $4, and I got a 12-pack for $3 more).

The variety in my food has been a nice mental change, but in truth, it really isn't a huge departure from what I have been doing for the past six months. But tomorrow's my day off, and I'm looking forward to that!

Family Workout

Because I've been limping through the week in an effort to get to the weekend to relax and rest off a cold I've been trying to shrug off like a bad joke, my workout was questionable today. And I hate the days when it's late and I don't have a workout complete.

I was definitely pushing it today, but decided that I did not want to have my exercise day off so early in the week. So tonight after dinner, I was able to talk Steve into going on a walk with me and Clancy. We did an easy 2 1/2 mile loop that involved one set of the stairs. Although just one set had me winded, I could easily remember the time only a few short weeks ago when I was up to seven (f'n) sets of the stairs. Sickness aside, I'm certain I could do seven sets again.

We stopped and looked at the ocean. And then we continued on our way and got a lot of entertainment out of Clancy's reaction to a remote control car doing wheelies all over the walking path along the park that overlooks the ocean. We stopped for a minute and the "driver" of the "car" "drove" the car in Clancy's direction and Clancy playfully pretended to get ready to pounce on the car. It was the highlight of the walk.

It was nice to get fresh air and to spend time with my boys.

Now This Feels Good

So after two weeks off the game, where I managed to do a lot of damage, I'm happy to say that I'm back "on."

Today I went back to the gym. I started drinking a shitload of water. I tracked my food. I followed a plan. I didn't check my email in bed before my feet stepped onto the cold morning ground. And I'm blogging on this here blog again.

And yes, it feels good.

It's amazing to me how quickly I can ruin a good thing. How easily and completely I can take four weeks of hard work and make one bad food choice after another, and be right back where I started. I know from years and years and years of experience in putting myself down that talking shit about myself only makes it worse. On top of being back where I started, I then trash talk about make myself feel bad in the process. So let's skip all that and just say, I truly hope I'm one step closer to learning how to treat myself and my body better when I'm not playing the Game.

For this next four week round I've decided to follow the Weight Watchers points system. I still have to eat within 2-4 hour time frame, but I figured it'd be good to try and switch things up a bit to help avoid plateus. Although, I'm really good at avoiding plateaus by eating everything I want between games and then losing a lot the first week back. So I really don't need to worry about that too much now do I?

I'm feeling a little under the weather, so I'm calling it quits for the night. But as I stated in the title, it feels really good to be back at this!

Welcome Quinn Eloise!

Today my life got a whole lot sweeter because of the arrival of this precious, gorgeous and amazing little bundle of love



Quinn- I can't wait to meet you. I love you endlessly already!

Bringing out the Big Guns

The book I mentioned I was reading to help prepare me for life when I'm not playing the Game is called "The Beck Diet Solution: How to Train Your Brain to Think Like a Thin Person." In it, one of the suggestions they make is to find a diet coach- someone who can help you when you're stuck and for you to be accountable to.

When I'm on the game, I don't need that. I can do the Game part of it all on my own and with all of the support that I get from the women I play with. But when I'm not on the Game, I stray. And so, in a huge effort to not do that, and to be really serious with this weight loss effort of mine, I've decided that yeah, in some capacity I need a "diet coach."

What I really need is someone who I'm checking in with- someone who is helping keep me in line and calling me out on my shit. And who better to do that then my big sis Kara. Today on my way to an appointment, I called Kara and asked if she'd be willing to play that part for me.

She of course said yes. And I knew that there was no turning back. As much as I don't want to tell Kara I had a brownie for breakfast (only one, does that count for anything), I already know that I am being more mindful of what I'm putting in my mouth because I know I'll be reporting on it to her.

This is a really big step for me and I'm happy that I'm taking it. Cause as great as it is to win $100 for being the biggest loser, I'd like to win it for not losing all the same weight I've lost before.

Week 4 Results- Game 7

Final weigh-in for the game was yesterday and thank all the lords above, I met my weight goal! Guess fitting in three workouts paid off!

I was the biggest loser for the team. A prize I'm sick of winning because it's mostly a measure of how much I stray during the week off the Game. I was also on the winning team. And I split the winnings for the person with the most points. So this was a very profitable round of the game for me.

This round of the game, we added in another way to earn money which was to measure how many inches we were able to lose during the four week game. I felt all proud of myself for having lost 6". I thought I had a really great chance of winning for most overall inches lost, but boy was I wrong. These impressive ladies I played with kicked my ass in the inches department. One of them lost more than 12". I'm so happy for and proud of these women who are changing their lives and seeing great results in the process.

At the end of this four weeks, I'm ready for the Game to be over with. We have about a week and a half off before we start up another round and I have to think of a solid plan to make sure I am not ruining all of my hard work by making poor food choices over and over again.

At this point, I've lost 37 lbs and 26".

A LOT to be proud of- and I am!

Last Chance Workouts

Yes, plural.

Like a mad woman (or ahole), I managed to get in three workouts today.

I started off the day with a spin class. The instructor, a substitute for the normal dood, teaches her class so that you are constantly on the brink of being "breathless." This means we spend a lot of time with the resistance cranked up high and doing seated and standing climbs. This also means that I constantly feel like I'm going to die. But, at the end, I've burned nearly 500 calories, crossed lots of mental barriers and feel stronger than the previous class. So it's not all that bad.

Plus, when Katie and I exited the spin room, we were greeted with Ty Pennington running on the treadmill- another dream come true for Katie. (On Oscar Sunday was Katie's first Ty sighting and I don't know if I've ever seen her happier. We also saw Hilary Swank. And I introduced myself to Bill Rancic and told him I'm loving his reality show with his wife Guiliana. Yes, I watch it and it IS great.)

After a handful of conference calls and a bunch of work, I took a late lunch and did the following weight training workout at the gym by myself:

4-way lunges (3x5)
front lunge-


back lunge-


lateral lunge-


cross over lunge- (i'm not very good at these)


split squat jump on box (3x30)- imagine this exercise, but doing it onto a workout box


open/close (2x30)- front raise, open to side and down, then reverse)



overhead dumbbell press (2x30)


lawnmower pulls (3x20)- a first for me


stability ball plank hold (3x30 seconds)- feet on ball


single leg straight leg reaches (3x10)


straight leg kickbacks (3x10)- minus the cable


cable cross- lo to hi (3x10)


cable cross- hi to lo (3x10)- imagine the exercise above just going in the opposite direction.

cable cross- lateral (3x10)- one of my favorite exercises!


mountain climbers on the bosu ball (3x30 seconds)


bosu crunch (3x20)


Now...as if that wasn't enough, I decided to go back one last time tonight to run a quick two miles on the treadmill and then go hang out in the steam room.

The scale hasn't been playing nice and I'm trying to do everything I can to make sure I make goal tomorrow for the final weigh-in of this round of the Game. Wish me luck!

One thing I know for sure- I better sleep like a log tonight!