Goodbye Ireland...for now

I’ve been listening to a song on repeat during this trip. It’s called What A Day by Greg Laswell. The first part goes, “What a day to be alive. What a day to realize I’m not dead. What a day to save a dime…” The first part of the song resonated so much with me on this trip, especially that first line which I belted out with gusto everytime I heard the song come through the short rotation in the CD player. (Travel tip- be sure to burn a CD to listen to in the rental car so you have some good music you can depend on). Each day was one wonderful adventure after another and I’m so grateful that it happened. More than that though, I’m proud of myself for going through with it and making it happen.

Although I’m not ready to go, I’m okay with going back home. I miss Steve & Clancy, Susannah, The Girls, my friends, my home and my bed. But I’m very content here. I have really enjoyed this last leg especially. Getting the chance to do my own thing, on my own time has been completely restorative and liberating. It’s helped me slow things down a bit. Being in Ireland you kinda can’t help but slow things down. But as I was meandering around the back roads of Ireland only having a partial clue of where I was and where I was headed, I felt happy and content and completely at peace with having no real agenda, no real contact with people and just being left to my own thoughts and wishes.

In hindsight I love the way the trip was broken up. I loved starting out all in a group touring all around. It was exhausting going to a new place each night, but we got to see so much of the country. Going to The Thatch and celebrating our birthday there with 14 friends from all over the US was an amazing experience. I still can’t believe that we managed to pull that off. I was so happy to introduce everyone to Gene and to how much authentic and genuine Irish fun you can (and will) have when you visit The Thatch. It was by far the best night of the trip. I got to see parts of Ireland that I’d never seen before- Dingle- and felt once again, that my heart really belongs along the west coast, especially County Kerry- nicely enough where some of our family originated. It’s so beautiful and green and I loved being near the ocean. After being in the country for five nights, it felt great to get into the city. Although I was hesitant about Dublin, not loving it the first, and only, time I went in 2000, it was a great contrast to what we had been doing. Apart from the fact that we were staying in the same place for a few nights at a time, it felt good to be in a city and get the energy that comes with being around so many other people, places and sounds.

The second leg, going to Italy, was intended just to see Amy and meet Rebecca and Amy’s other friends. I didn’t do any research and had no agenda. Amy and I figured we’d wing it; I knew no matter what we did (even if it wasn’t anything at all) it’d be great to just be in each other’s company. And you know, get some pizza  But I got to see three totally different places in Italy: Milan, Venice and Lake Como. We did so much walking there too. Everywhere we went we used public transportation and then hoofed it around our final destinations. There were also a lot of stairs involved in Italy. There are 56ish steps to get up to Amy’s apartment and we did a lot of climbing up and down. After spending so much time in a car in Ireland, it felt fantastic to be outside and moving. Apart from that, Italy was really beautiful. Beautiful in such a different way than Ireland. Impressive buildings and history in a way that you don’t see in the same way in Ireland. Although I find the people to be completely unfriendly (to be fair it’s hard to top Ireland but still), there was so much beauty in each place we went to and I loved getting to see it all in such a short period of time.

The last leg here, the solo trip, was meant to be an opportunity for me to just do my own thing and most importantly, spend time by myself. As I’ve mentioned before, it’s not something I’m good at or comfortable with. I always find ways to fill my time so that I’m always keeping busy…so this week has been a great exercise in helping me understand and benefit from the importance of slowing the f down and living a quieter, simpler, easier life. I’ve loved talking with and meeting new people. I’ve enjoyed becoming comfortable with eating (and sometimes drinking) on my own. I’m starting to understand how valuable it is to spend time with yourself. It’s helped me become clearer on how I should be spending my time at home and how easy it is for me to consciously slow down the pace of my life. There are enormous benefits to doing so and I’m looking forward to seeing how it affects me at home.

I don’t hate my life by any means. There are a million things I love about my life and am looking forward to resuming when I get home today (waaaa). But I do need to make some changes to how I go about my life. Yesterday when I was driving and felt stress (pretty much a foreign feeling to me since I got to Ireland but especially since the solo leg of the trip), I just took some deep breaths, looked around and started smiling. And then I tried to locate the stress. It was mainly because I was unsure of where exactly I was and where I was going and then how much time did I have left to do the other things I had hoped to. I had two choices- 1. Try and fit it all in and be stressed out by cramming more things into an already full day. Or 2. Turn around and go back to Westport where I can have time built into chill out after all the driving. Completely within my control and in a matter of minutes, I was feeling much, much better and had decided to head back to Westport and save the rest for my next trip.

I pile too much on. I try to do too much. I don’t take enough time for me. I have a hard time saying no. I work too much. I don’t spend enough time with Steve. All things that can and will be changed in time. But this trip has provided me with a great start to making some changes. One of the things I’m proudest of myself for is not doing a single bit of work at all!

When I got to the hotel last night, I found myself thinking about checking work email, you know to get a head start. I mean I was just sitting there with nothing really to do. So why not? Because I’m on vacation. Because I could get out my book, get on the bed and relax! I opted against checking work email and for enjoying my last day in Ireland no matter how boring it was at the airport hotel. I know this sounds like ridiculously easy concepts- don’t work, you’re on vacation. But I typically don’t operate that way. I think, “Why NOT work? I’m not doing anything else.” Now I know the answer is because I’m more valuable than that. And that doing nothing is just as important as anything else I could do be doing. It’s what will help me slow down, maintain a somewhat balanced life and help me keep sane and somewhat stress-free. And it’s not nothing. Doing nothing is a conscious act to help restore and repair my mental and physical stability.

There have been days on this trip where I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face. Feeling so happy I could feel the tears starting to form in my eyes. And being so grateful to be in these places and with these people. It's been a wonderful feeling.

It started at The Thatch when we were all learning how to dance, but really lasted all night long. Being able to have that party with those people will likely stand to be one of the most memorable experiences of my life.



Another one was when I drove into Dingle. The rolling green vibrant hills with the white spotted sheep were breathtaking and unlike anything I'd seen in Ireland before.



In Italy getting to see the Duomo for the first time, and the second time, and the third...although I was scared at the top (what, apart from it raining, it’s already a height fearing person’s semi-nightmare), it was stunning. I love knowing that Amy & Rebecca go up there sometimes to just write and draw. In contrast, in LA I guess it’d be like saying “I’m going to write and paint on the Hollywood Sign.” But this wouldn’t happen for a couple of reasons. 1. I’d get arrested. You can’t get anywhere near the Hollywood Sign, in fact if you do get too close, a helicopter will arrive within a matter of minutes to tell you to back away or you run the risk of violating a federal offense. And 2. It’s lame. Especially in comparison of saying you’re at the Duomo.



Meeting Rebecca!


On Saturday getting to walk around Venice was another huge highlight. But the moment that made me smile the most was when Amy and I were sitting on a bench in St. Mark’s Square looking out at all the gondolas waiting to be used. Although to be fair, I think the moments on Saturday when I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face was when Amy and I were purposely using the Molly Pole to take pictures just because we knew people were staring. I’d take my own picture and Amy would be off in the distance laughing while trying to get a picture of people’s reactions with her camera. I’m still smiling thinking about it. When I was done, Amy’d use the Molly Pole and I would use her camera to take pictures. We did this atop the Grand Rialto Bridge- you know, it doesn’t see too much traffic or anything :)



Tuesday up at Achill Island while I was driving around somewhat aimlessly, and there was a moment where I saw the most stunning view of the sun poking through the clouds. The sun flooded the scene below and it turned out to be an incredible picture that doesn’t look like I could have possible taken it or witnessed it. I also loved when Farmer Tom pulled over to talk with him and give me a mini history lesson on the side of the road. And the sheep in the Deserted Village where highly entertaining that day.



At 401am I woke up on Wednesday to discover that Barack Obama was going to be our next president. So many emotions were running through my head- happiness, relief, hope, fright, excitement, amazement and comforted by the thought that anything can (and just did) happen. I went back to sleep with a huge smile on my face that morning.

On Wednesday I explored some unknown territory, again, and was blown away by the beautiful mountains, lakes and everything in between that I drove through. I got out of the car a couple of times to take pictures but when I went home and saw them on the computer, they didn’t capture the magnificence.



Then on Wednesday night was one of those times. Although I technically had one more night in Ireland, I knew Wednesday was going to be my last night out. My new friend Norman invited me to his music session at a pub called The Porter house. When I walked in Norman yelled out my name and said “Obama!” with his fist pumping in the air. I felt so happy, proud to be an American, and happy to be in this pub.

I love the pub culture in Ireland. I love the idea that people spill into the pub to listen to the music knowing full well at some point almost every single person will break out into song. The music was so good and I felt so happy to be there.





And my last can’t wipe the smile off my face moment was yesterday when I was walking around Cong Abbey. I walked behind the Abbey and discovered this absolutely amazing nature trail. I stepped in crunchy leaves to get to this little fishing hut type of thing- somewhere I’ve dubbed my happy place because it was so peaceful and private and immediately helped me feel a sense of calm come over my entire body. It was incredibly serene and the soundtrack of the birds singing in the background is so full of joy and natural perfection it sounds 100% fake (I of course have the video to prove that’s not true). I found myself wishing I had more time to just walk around and get lost in the woods to take a walk without any destination. It was the perfect way to end the trip.



Ireland has always been a special place to me. A handful of the best memories of my life have happened there. And I have no doubt that there are more wonderful memories just waiting to be created the next time I go back.

As I get ready to go back home, all I can say is that I had the trip of a lifetime. I feel happy and refreshed, calm and peaceful, stress-free and balanced, restored and renewed. I have no regrets and feel so fortunate this trip went as well as it did.

Best of Molly in Ireland

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Exploring Lake Como with Amy

Amy and I had a long day yesterday and by the end of it, we weren’t sure if we were going to head to Lake Como (as planned) or bum around Milan. We decided to not set an alarm and just make a decision based on how we were feeling once we woke up.

When we got up this morning, both of us were up for the short one-hour train ride to Lake Como and I’m so glad we went. What’s been really great about this side trip to Italy is that I really didn’t have any expectations (apart from the whole pizza thing). I didn’t do any research whatsoever on this leg of the trip and my only desire was to see Amy, spend time with her and get to know her friends over here. The fact that we’ve done so much exploring is really just an added bonus. And I can’t help but feel fortunate to have had such a thorough tour of three very different parts of Italy.

After having my very first cappuccino of my life, we got on the train and headed out to Lake Como.



My only knowledge of Lake Como before this was that George Clooney lived there. As soon as we got off the train we walked around in search of food. Unlike Milan and Venice, the part of Lake Como that we first explored was pretty empty. Except for a few touristy type of shops, mostly everything else was closed. But we did a little loop and found a place to get some lunch. We ordered a pepperoni pizza with bufula mozzarella cheese and it was soooo good! It was different than the other pizza I’d eaten so far and both Amy & I devoured it entirely.



Once we housed the pizza, we worked some of it off by walking around the lake, bringing out the Molly Pole for more self-portraits, and then stumbled upon a boat tour for only €5.



It was just about to take off, so we hopped on and realized as we sat down that we had no clue what we had just gotten ourselves into- specifically we didn’t know how long it was or where it went (other than around the lake). For all we knew, it could be four hours long and we’d miss our train back to Milan. That wasn’t the case. What we did get ourselves into was a short 30 minute ride around some of the most beautiful homes in all of Lake Como. It was a wonderful way to see the homes and I loved being out on the water. Although one downfall was that we couldn’t hear or understand a single part of the narration from the captain of the boat.







Again, our timing was perfect and once we got off the boat, we hit up a little gift shop and then got back on the train in time to go back to Milan.

We ended the night with getting together for sushi (seriously!) with Amy, Rebecca, their roommate Lisa and three of their girlfriends. It was another great end to a wonderful day.

Although I’m looking forward to getting back to Ireland (friendly people, no pick pocketers, etc.) I’ve had such a great time in Italy and am sad at the thought of leaving Amy tomorrow. It’s been amazing to see her life here- to see how comfortable she is in this life and this city. She speaks the language so well and has made such wonderful friends. It reminds me of my life on exchange in LA in 1999. The experiences she’s having, the trips she’s taking, the people she’s meeting…all of it is so exciting and I am so happy I got to be a part of this time of her life.

When I look back on my experience at Dominguez Hills almost 10 freaking years ago, I had no way of knowing just how much that would change the entire course of my life. I smile thinking about how fortunate I was to do that program, to have met Audrey, Carrie and Jena. For it’s those people and that time of my life that has had the most influence on how my life is now. And although there have been moments of sadness along the way, I can pinpoint that time as probably the most pivotal point in my life. And I see that in Amy’s experiences in Milan and get so excited to think about how this will undoubtedly change the course of her life.

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Exploring Venice with Amy

Amy and I took the train to Venice today and had such a great time. We got an early start to the day, took the metro to the train station, hopped on the train and 2 ½ hours later we were in Venice. It’s amazing how different it is from Milan.

First of all, you walk everywhere! We got off the train station and walked around from 1130am until 6pm. And as tiring as it was, and at times my dogs were barkin’, it felt great to be outside and active for so long. There aren’t any cars in Venice because you get around everyone on boats! I resisted the urge to go on a gondola ride. Not because I don’t love Amy and not because I didn’t want to do it, but because I hope to go back one day with Steve and share that experience with him (Amy if you are reading this, you can’t take it personally!). So yeah, boats and water everywhere which means you walk all over the city.

It was very beautiful and picturesque. I think in total we took close to 200 pictures. The super awesome present from Kara came in handy today and at this point has become something that I love to whip out just to see how other people will react. We used it all over Venice and got so many stares that we orchestrated taking pictures with us (using the Molly Pole) on my camera while sly’ly taking pictures of other people’s reactions of the Molly Pole with Amy’s camera.

It’s so much fun to go to a place where you’ve only ever seen in beautiful pictures. The canals and gondolas were great to see in person. It’s not like it’s any different then what you see in the movies or anywhere else, but it’s cool to see them yourself. Eloquent words are failing me a bit right now, but hopefully you get the point. To see this stuff in person is obviously way better than getting it through pictures and movies! Except if they're my pictures.







In Venice we went to the top of Campanile di San Marco. It was originally built as a lighthouse to assist navigation in the lagoon, but now visitors can hop on an elevator to the top. You get incredible views of Venice, the lagoon and the Alps in the distance (on a clear day). We got amazing pictures of the entire city. It was beautiful to look out and see the city in all her glory. Rebecca had asked later that night if I enjoyed it and without any hesitation I said “YES!” She asked because some people find it depressing. When I asked why, she reminded me that the city is technically sinking due to the water rising and that when some people go there, it’s all they can think about.

I had the opposite reaction. I really loved Venice. The city is so vibrant. Full of people who appeared to be much more friendly than any of the “locals” I encountered in Milan. This is probably because it’s a much smaller city and the chances of being surrounded by massive amounts of tourists is much greater. But it was the architecture and the small walkways and canals that really moved me. I loved the hanging laundry from people’s balconies. The dogs walking around without leashes following their owners around without hesitation. The Venetian glass (jewelry) everywhere. The people who spoke Italian and English and who humored me by smiling when I would say “por favore” or “gratzie.” The Rialto Bridge, St. Mark's Square and Basilica, The Grand Canal…

It was just perfect. Me and Amy finally catching up after spending a long time apart and getting into a very comfortable groove talking about everything and nothing. The timing was also perfect. It was the perfect amount of time to arrive, walk around, eat, shop, explore, talk and meander back through the narrow moonlit streets to the train station. As we made our way over the Grand Canal for the last time as we walked to the train station, we were treated with an amazing nighttime view of Venice with my favorite moon!



And maybe what I loved the most was that we didn’t have a map at all. We just walked around and followed the signs pointing us in the direction the Rialto & S. Marco and had a perfect day.

The train ride back was incredibly relaxing and provided me with enough time to try and catch up on my personal journal and I also feel in love with a little Indian girl who kept smiling at me. And on the way home, we swung by the place we had pizza the first night and capped off the evening with some insalata mista no pomodore and pizza margherita and coca cola light por favore.

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Exploring Milan with Amy

I arrived in Milan last night and promptly went out for pizza with Amy to a place right around the corner from her apartment. We came right home and ate it at the table while I got to (finally) meet Rebecca. The pizza was delicious and I’m so excited to be in Italy- seeing Amy’s life here, meeting her friends who have become her family here in Italy and getting to explore a new country.

My first impression after walking around the city for a little bit today is that Milan is definitely not Ireland! The people are not friendly at all. The men are creepy- they stare at you and when you look at them and make eye contact, they keep staring with absolutely no change in their facial expression or attempt to change the direction of their glance. When I’m busted staring at a total stranger I either smile at them sheepishly as if to say “busted” or I look away as quickly as I can pretending I’m obviously looking at something else. But here in Italy, men are just not like that! It’s a little unsettling but not something that catches me completely off-guard either as I've been prepared.

It’s miserable today. It’s raining and raining and raining. And I realize in Ireland this was okay mainly because we spent so much time driving from one place to the next and it didn’t matter much. But here in Milan it’s putting a serious damper in terms of walking around and exploring. Turns out that’s completely fine with both me and Amy who are fine making a few key stops checking out touristy things in Milan before we fled back to her apartment to catch up on good ol’ American TV while hiding out from the horrendous weather.

Today we explored the Duomo and the Galleria. The Duomo is insanely beautiful and impressive. It’s the 3rd largest church in the world and took over 200 years to build.



After looking through the inside of the church, we went back outside and took the stairs up to the top of the Duomo. We had to pay money to climb up nearly 200 steps…which I find funny for some reason. I get that if you can make money off the view, go for it, but it makes me laugh thinking that I paid money to climb up stairs that had me huffing and puffing all the way up (and at one point I thought I’d go bat shit crazy because the stairway was so narrow and circular). Once we reached the top I was overwhelmed by how beautiful it was (and by how annoying this rain was!) and then almost simultaneously caught off guard by how anxious I felt by how high up we were and how tiny everyone below us in the piazza looked. Apparently in my older age I’ve become afraid of heights, which is rad. Amy & I walked around the top of the Duomo a little more, took some obligatory pictures and then made our way down.







When Amy asked me what I wanted to do while visiting her, I said I really didn’t care. She said she’d be up for “whatever my little heart desired.” So I decided to test that theory and let her know I wanted pizza for every meal. When Amy said lunch was going to be something that I’d continue to crave for the rest of my life, and it wasn’t exactly pizza, I was skeptical (and a little scared- in a good way) but up for the challenge. Amy did not disappoint. We went to a place called Luini where we ate Panzerotti- the basic Panzerotti is folded with mozzarella and tomato (sauce) inside. I think it’s some sort of a deep fried crust/bread with all the goodness inside, melted and hot and warms you up right away. Picture a calzone but 100 times better and deep fried. I’ll have to try and sneak in another visit before leaving Milan.







When we left Luini’s we took the long way to the metro and stumbled upon a church. While Amy was telling me a little about it, a flashy, friendly Spaniard turned around to tell us a little more about it. Almost immediately he launched into telling the both of us that we have good aura (Amy- green and orange and me- yellow and blue) and that he’d like to read our palms. He goes on and on about how he’s a hermaphrodite and goes as far as telling Amy that his male name is Sergio but he’s still working on his female name which he’ll need before the operation in two years time. No transition whatsoever, just goes from aura, to hermaphrodite, to wanting to read our palms.

Sergio was captivating, apart from the whole hermaphrodite thing. He looked at me and said that Ireland was meaningful to me and I basically fell under his spell from the beginning. He gave Amy her palm reading first because he thought her hand would be more of a challenge. When he was done with Amy’s reading, he took my hand and said all sorts of things. It was interesting how right on he was about a lot of the things he said to me. The one thing he said that’ll stick with me for a while is that I give away too much bread. He said that if there’s a big piece of bread, I give the biggest piece away to everyone else and leave very little for myself. It’s a metaphor for something that I’m completely aware of and have attempted to work on for the past few years, but it still something I certainly struggle with quite a bit. He also said that there were some cliffs in Ireland that were very meaningful to me. This also struck a chord with me because we had just scattered my Dad’s ashes the week before at the Cliffs of Moher. He also said that I have family walking around Ireland waiting to meet me. (I’ll gladly go back and try to find them!).

Here's the only shot I managed to get of this dood as he was walking away:



It was a very interesting experience and I’m not holding my breath for anything he said, but it was just one more adventure for me and Amy and gave us a lot to laugh about and think over.

We ended the night with a short walk around the corner for more pizza (which I didn’t love) and my first bit of gelato- that was delicious! Tomorrow we’re taking the train to Venice and I’m really looking forward to going.

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Hello Italy!

Coming to Italy has been a huge bonus on my Ireland vacation. It means I get to spend time with Amy- see her life over here, meet her friends, explore Italy and just spend some quality time with her. For those of you who don't know her, we probably don't know each other that well, but Amy is my best friend from New Hamsphire who I lived with in San Francicso and is now living in Milan teaching at the American School of Milan. Amy's in the middle of her second of a three year contract. And exploring with her just a little bit last night made it obvious already that being here is easy for her. Not in the way that everything is perfect, but she's acclimated really well, speaks the language enough to fool me that she has always lived here...and most importantly knows where to get great pizza right around the corner from her apartment.

Amy & I have such an easy and fun friendship that we fell right back into and spent a lot of last night catching up and laughing- a lot.



I love seeing where she lives and meeting the people who have become like family to her. And I finally got to meet one of those most important people, Rebecca, last night (Hi Rebecca!) which was fantastic. It's going to be a great few days here and I'm really looking forward to seeing Milan, Venice & Lake Como.

Amy & I are off to explore Milan in the rain (boo), get more pizza, try gelato and then meet up with more of Amy's friends later tonight for...you guessed it, more pizza!

PS- Things I've already learned about Italy:
1. You can't put your feet up on empty seats on the train.
2. You can, however, drink a beer on the train or anywhere for that matter.
3. Dogs are allowed inside restaurants. Inside the first restaurant (which Amy doesn't actually know the name of, she just refers to it as Pizza D'Asporto, which actually means pizza to go) I stepped into where I got my first pizza, Amy and I were talking when all of a sudden I heard a dog barking. Interestingly, this didn't phase Amy at all. A few seconds later, I saw the dog trotting through the restaurant with no one, but me, curious about this.

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Day of Nothing

Everyone left early this morning and I was up to say goodbye. Since then I've been outside for maybe an hour to grab dinner. Otherwise, I've been in bed resting, relaxing, getting caught up on the blog and doing nothing. It's been a dream of a day!

Tomorrow I head off to Milan to visit Amy until Monday. We're planning on taking a day trip to Venice on Saturday and then Lake Como on Sunday. I'm really looking forward to seeing Amy and going to Italy for the first time.

After that it's back here to Ireland where I'm going to explore more of the west coast, which is where my heart really is.

I'm absolutely exhausted and am looking forward to another day of doing mostly nothing before I leave for Italy!

I miss everyone but am having so much fun reliving the memories from the past week. I can't believe we pulled it off!

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